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objects in mirror are fussier than they appear

I'm kind of an asshole. Over the past month, I haven't been living the unfussy kind of barefoot life I constantly talk about. I was actually living more of a ‘shoed’ life - in the kind of shoes that are too narrow, a size too small, and cause blisters the size of baseballs.

I constantly talk about keeping things easy, taking things in stride, and not letting stress get to me. A lot of people have commented to me how calm I seemed while preparing for our move. I laughed - if only they saw me in action at home. Our loved ones definitely get to see us in our truest form – for better or for worse. Over the past few weeks, I have been erring on the side of worse. Thank you

Then I felt more like a fraud. Our loved ones definitely get to see us in our truest form – for better or for worse. Over the past few weeks, I have been erring on the side of worse. Thank you

Our loved ones definitely get to see us in our truest form – for better or for worse. Over the past few weeks, I've been erring on the side of worse. Thank you hunny, for putting up with me.

These are all words that recently left my mouth: Stress-bag, emotional mess, nervous breakdown, tense, nauseous, sick, stressed, strung-out, short of breath, lack of focus, irritable, impatient, exhausted, irrational.

I didn't handle the stress of selling a house, packing, moving, and getting settled in a new place with much grace at all. In fact, it was the most ungraceful dance I've ever danced - I was more like a train-wreck. Ryan and I fought, I had no patience for the kids, I snapped easily and often, and responded to set-backs by attacking whoever the poor soul was that delivered news I didn' want to hear.

I felt it very difficult to live life in the moment and not focus on my massive and constantly growing to-do list. I learned a lot of lessons during this rough period. It was hard, but I got through it. When I go through another period of adjustment like the one we just went though, I plan to take the lessons I learned and be more present and handle the stress better.

Important lessons:

  • I had choices. I chose to move and I chose to make it happen in a month. I also chose to react with negativity when things did not go the way I expected.
  • how I handle stress affects everybody around me. When I let anxiety get the best of me, the kids are irritable, the dogs are tense, and Ryan is usually feeling what I'm feeling too.
  • this too shall pass...it always gets easier

5 things that helped me stay sane

  1. smoothies - a breakfast I don't have to think about and veggies in the morning
  2. showering in the dark. I found this incredibly calming and a peaceful way to either start or end the day.
  3. making a point to find some alone time to sit or lay quietly, close my eyes and just breathe
  4. to help keep me healthy I stayed on top of my supplement regime which includes a daily probiotic, increasing my vitamin C intake, adding a serving of green tea, and taking echinacea
  5. getting to bed on time - If I sleep well, I handle stress well (or maybe just slightly better)

 

These moves probably saved me from an ugly breakdown. Although I had a few outbursts where I let situations get the better of me, putting myself in ‘time-out’ made a big difference. I'm on a journey, and everything is progress.

PS - 6 ways to have waaaaay more fun while getting out the door in the morning, A letter to my kids from the locked bathroom door, and, I am SO good at failing